Ninja Poof #1 (Shacked City)

Dear Diary,

You'll undoubtedly be very much unsurprised to hear of our journey into Carceri. As you already know, Carceri is a prison plane, filled to the vast, uninteresting brim with all sorts of crazies, mass-murderers, and people who were made to "disappear" when they became inconvenient to have around.

Adimarcus is trapped here, in some sort of asylum for enemies of the demon lord Gratz. And we're going to let him out, believe it or not. I know it's a bad idea, but we have to kill him in order to save the world as we know it. For the hundredth time, I never should have come back to Cauldron.

As nice as it is to see Barak again, and as much fun as it's been to make the many new friends I've gained, I really don't want to be here at all. This is madness, the same type of madness that tells you to drink from the lake in the midst of Cauldron, the same sort of madness that keeps you from going out and using your skills to make real money by killing bad folks in their sleep and stealing important bits of treasure from under kings' noses.

I'm really not cut out for all this 'hero' business, and I know it. Barak, bless his poor befuddled soul, sees it too. Yet he still seems to want me here with the rest of them. Says it's good for my spiritual health, or some rubbish like that. As if I'm in danger of falling forever into the cesspool of a moral-free life.

So anyway, we're in this asylum, and we're trying to find Adimarcus. I'm sure he's up at the very top somewhere, being an inconvenience to us and polluting the planes with his special brand of madness. I'm sure that we'll have good chuckles with him. If he's asleep when we find him, I'm afraid Barak is going to be very angry at me. Fair fights are wonderful when you're built like he is, after all, but some of us have to resort to far more devious means (not to mention clever, stylish, and just generally quicker). And whoever said that knifing someone in the vitals is unfair, anyway? That seems a bit silly, doesn't it? As if real fights are all about honor and justice and everlasting holy nonsense just spilling out of the ears of both combatants! We gang up on lone foes as often as not, don't we?

Ah, well, here comes Barak. He says we'd better get moving soon, as we probably still have a few floors left to check. I tell him that Adimarcus is going to be on the top floor, and he scowls. He knows I'm right, and says as such, but he also says that we need to check every door on the way up ... just in case.

Moradin's greasy, unkempt, food-stained beard ... I could use a tall glass of something alcoholic right about now! That will be the one nice thing about this whole experience; when it's over, I will appreciate the finer things in life ever so much more than I do now!

I'll be sure to let you know how this whole mess turns out, assuming I'm alive after we reach Adimarcus. And assuming Gratz doesn't show up to kick us out of his finely crafted prison. Here's hoping!

=+= Slade =+=